Thursday, December 29, 2011

Friday, December 23, 2011

Happy Christmas to my 222

Hi All,
I want to wish my dear followers a very happy and joyous Christmas.

I've had the worst week. I have a part-time retail job; and I'd pretty much rather die than admit how absolutely awful it's been this lead-up to Christmas.
Dear customers: If you throw it, or swear, or it doesn't fit you, or you're drunk, or you're stressed, or you're broke: I still have to deal with you're tantrums and guess what: I HATE IT. You've killed Christmas for me.

Numerous tears later, in the toilets, I forced myself to take stock.
I wasn't born here. Nor do I have to fight for my life. My sanity is my own. My family all live. We have stuff. Food. A bed. Beloved is safe and well; and IN MY LIFE. It might sound a bit 'Jolie', but I'm well off. I'm one of the lucky ones.

So, this Christmas, I'm going to be grateful for what I do have; and fear less, what I still need to create for myself, and my loved ones.

A trip to my spiritual home is on the cards, as is the on-going creation of the New World with my Beloved.

Thankyou all, for following, and commenting. For reading my bloody rants.
Happy Christmas.
Your Doll.

Friday, December 16, 2011

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

In Pace

To dance. For you. Into the night. Into forever. My joy.

Every morning we are born again. What we do today is what matters most. Siddhārtha Gautama

The best love is the kind that awakens the soul and makes us reach for more, that plants a fire in our hearts and brings peace to our minds. And that’s what you’ve given me. That’s what I’d hoped to give you forever.

You can pretend for a long time, but one day it all falls away and you are alone. We are alone in the most beautiful place in the world. Jean Rhys

She wanted something to happen - something, anything: she did not know what. Kate Chopin

Sometimes I’m terrified of my heart; of its constant hunger for whatever it is it wants. The way it stops and starts.
 Edgar Allan Poe.

“If you remember me, then I don’t care if everyone else forgets.”
Haruki Murakami.

Wondering around in solitude this afternoon. An elderly lady offered me a tissue.
'Why are you sad? You have so much life ahead of you.'
How to explain that I'm struggling?
I thanked her; went on to the river. To be near the water.
'What do you want, Rianna? Hard's life, Bella. Take a deep breath. Walk home, quietly.'
On my way, I remembered this song. From Kenneth Branagh's 'Hamlet'.
I remembered how moved I'd been. I remembered that life is beautiful.
And that my love is stronger. Every day, stronger, than my fear.

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